Mani-Mani 2.0: Nutty, Naughty, & Nipply (Whaaat?)
Posted by Tats Quiblat on Tuesday, January 31, 2012 in Mani-Mani 2.0, News, Tats Quiblat
Hello, Lagarista Readers. Or should I say, Lagarista Lovers? Welcome to the new and improved Mani-Mani 2.0. What changed? Mani-Mani is going local! Show me some love! Hit the jump.
Mani-Mani 2.0 is your new and most important source of local film news and gossip. Especially gossip! The juicy and dirty ones. We all know the local film industry feeds on gossip. And whoever gets talked about becomes the zeitgeist and gets enough momentum to convince the powers that be that he or she can actually sell a movie. We all know how films are sold in this country, through the stars’ personal lives. Boo yeah!
So pardon me if from time to time I may resort to gutter entertainment worthy of the dirtiest tabloid. Trust that I’m just doing all these in jest.
So, shall we start the party?
“Sharon-Gabby, Hiwalay na Ulit.”
Wait, what? The Sharonian in me died a little when Sharon said the Sharon-Gabby Reunion Movie is not happening anytime soon. Cuneta officially confirmed the news when she guested on Wil Time BigTime on TV5. My mom will be devastated. She’s been waiting for a Sharon-Gabby reunion movie since 1992’s Tayong Dalawa.
1. Bridges of Madison County - This would be my dream movie for them. 4 Days of Epic Love Affair.
2. It’s Complicated - Divorced couple slowly falling in love again and decide to keep it a secret.
3. Revolutionary Road - C’mon, no brainer. The breakdown of a marriage - one is in it for the adventure, the other is in it to settle down.
4. Out of Africa - Baroness/haciendera falls in love with an adventurous hunter/farmer. She gets a VD from him.
5. The Mirror Has Two Faces - Sharon would flip over if she is offered to play the role of a lit professor.
6. The Bodyguard - Sharon a Popstar, falling in love with her bodyguard? This hasn’t been done locally, right? Hmmm. Sounds very familiar.
7. Ghost - You’re imagining it already. Sharon, wet pottery clay, and a ghoulish translucent Gabby hugging her from the back, to the tune of “Hindi Kita Malilimutan.”
“Iza Calzado gives in to Stardom, signs up with the Kapamilya Network.”
(Oh, that’s why it’s nipply!)
Calzado signed a 3-year contract with ABS-CBN, which includes a TV Series, a Reality TV Show, and and a movie. This only means one thing, Iza is ready to take her place in the spotlight. She deserves it.
Let’s list down a “Top 5 Possible Kapamilya Leading Men for Iza Calzado.”
1. Piolo Pascual - They should do a really dark and gritty film where either can be both deglamorized, dirtied up, and uglified. Probably something like London Boulevard.
2. Diether Ocampo - Maybe Iza can help bring new energy into Diet’s career.
3. Zanjoe Marudo - It’s about time Iza stars in a sexy film. And Zanjoe will be the perfect tabasco to heat up her pizza. If you know what I mean. Something like Indecent Proposal or Sliver.
4. Derek Ramsay - Iza would be perfect as a femme fatale hunting down Derek Ramsay. Something like Basic Instinct or Fatal Attraction.
5. Bugoy Cariño - Not May-December, you perverts. Maybe a very young retelling of Harold and Maude? No? It might work you know!
“The Imee Marcos-Kris Aquino Festival”
Exciting, right? Imee is said to have mentioned in a Press Conference that she’s willing to co-produce films with Kris Aquino. Imee is the producer of classic films Oro, Plata, Mata and Himala, and the award-winning 2011 MMFF entry Pintakasi. Kris, for her part, has produced 2 films—Segunda Mano and Dalaw. May I suggest Ms. Marcos and Ms. Aquino produce the same story, with the same cast and same director, only that Ms. Marcos will tell it from her perspective and Ms. Aquino will tell it from her point of view. Two sides of the same narrative. That will be a first!
Let’s see “Top Three Films Imee and Kris Should Produce Together But Told Differently”
1. The Eve of EDSA Revolution - 24 Hours Leading to the Revolution. It would be interesting to see the two families as they prepare for history to happen.
2. The Tyrant, The Tarmac, and The Truth - Set in 1983. We know how it will end, a man will be shot and will hit the tarmac the moment he steps out of the plane carrying him back to his country. The events surrounding that, told from two points of view, that would be awesome.
3. The Prince and the Pauper - A fictional narrative showing how it would have been if Bongbong and NoyNoy grew up as best friends only to be torn apart by politics and the freedom of a nation. Wew! Ito na ang Best Picture. Pang-Oscars. (Wait, I’m actually writing a spec script for this. Anyone interested? Haha. Shameless plugging.)
That’s it. There you go. Mani-Mani 2.0 Maiden Post. What do you think readers? Hit the like button if you feel like it. Hit the recommend button or share in Facebook. You tweet? Tweet this ma’homies! Follow me @tatsmenow! (Send me juicy tsismis stuff so we have something to speculate about next time!) Capisce?
